Costume calamity: Halloween corpse costume mistaken as forensic science project

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(THE ARTIST WAS EMBARRASED AND THUS THE NAME IS OMITTED)

ACCURATE SKETCH: Mystery student in the corpse costume is identified.

Mihir Kulkarni, Staff Writer

Widespread panic ensued after an anonymous student’s Halloween costume was mistaken for a Forensic Science project on Oct. 31. Students were stunned as a supposedly dead corpse began walking around with its arms outstretched.

“I was just frozen with fear,” junior Jack Lander said. “I thought I wasn’t going to make it out alive.”

The Forensic Science students’ project involved a mock crime scene, complete with evidence bags and a detailed procedure of how to investigate the scene. The centerpiece of the project was a realistic corpse, wrapped in toilet paper and some even with large bloodstains. Students brought their corpses to school and placed them down outside Room 1208, but were dumbfounded when they saw a corpse walking around the corner.

Many students initially believed that the walking corpse suffered from a peculiar case of Corpus Callosum, a condition where a dead body loses coordination of their limbs and begins to shake uncontrollably. Others believed it suffered from Chronic Bronchorpus, where the body begins to breathe uncontrollably and comes back to life for a short period of time. Luckily, Forensic Science teacher Mickey Dickson was on hand to clarify the situation.

“This is just a minor case of Corpse Confusion,” Dickson said. “It’s completely normal for a corpse to get up and move around, and our students must learn how to handle such situations.”

Despite the panic the walking corpse caused, many were more disturbed by the unfair treatment it received. The student was used as a corpse for the Forensic Science students to inspect, and a full scale investigation of the “wounds” complete with magnifying glasses and iPhone flashlights was conducted. Many complained that this was a violation of Habeas Corpus laws, as the student was kept in the classroom without a signed detention slip from a teacher.

“I feel I was unjustly treated by the Forensic Science program,” the anonymous student said. “I am considering legal action for the damages to my Halloween costume.”

Due to this incident, Irvine Unified School District is considering implementing restrictions to Halloween costumes worn to school.

Disclaimer: *this article was not created for the sole purpose of corpse puns*