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Top 10 Fun Things You Should Do Over Summer

  1. Consider the faults of the American bureaucracy. Is Democracy even real? Is the American Dream a lie? Is this the real life… or is this just fantasy? Easy come.. Easy go. Get really sidetracked and forget you ever thought anything other than “America’s the best”. Just in case the government ever reads this, we love America. USA… USA… USA.
  2. Pause a moment to remember the horrors of European imperialism.
  3. Investigate whether or not we’re all living in a computer program. Then, play “The Sims” to make yourself feel better.
  4. Sleep more… or don’t. Just shift everything over six hours. It’ll (probably) feel like you’re sleeping the full 8 hours if you wake up 8 hours later than everyone else.
  5. Since summer is supposed to be a break from regular homework, change things up by doing your AP summer assignments (they’re different—apparently).
  6. Explore all the internship opportunities for research available through Netflix. Who needs a law firm when you have “How To Get Away With Murder”?
  7. Start thinking about where you’d like to go to college and grad school. Then think about having a job, a family, and a retirement plan. After you’re done, rethink your life choices, and then ponder the afterlife.
  8. Take writing your college essays to a more psychological level. See the essay, be the essay, live the essay. Realize how completely boring life is when you’re just a bunch of anxiety ridden phrases on a piece of paper.
  9. Raise $100 million so Integrated Science 1 can start taking trips to space during their astronomy unit.
  10. Find that lost sense of teenage rebellion by going to school even when you’re not supposed to. Don’t worry, Elite counts.