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Tag Archives: Junk

Holiday conspiracy exposed?!

Have you ever wondered why the school always schedules Winter Break to conveniently begin right before Christmas? Certainly it can’t be to give students a popular holiday off so they can actually have fun with their friends and family instead of being constantly strangled by

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Studying tips for finals

Stressing over finals? Can’t seem to focus? Looking for ways to distract yourself from the fact that your toxic, lazy studying habits might become the deciding factor in some of the most important exams of your high school career? Fear not, Northwood! The Howler has

Communist turkeys take over California

Broiling flames of rebellion sweep across California as investigations reveal that several cities are now under the control of communist turkeys. Led by Leon Turksky, more than 250 million factory-farmed gobblers (Agriocharis Ocellata) have joined the Communist Party of Turkeys—not to be confused with the

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Quiz: Which Thanksgiving food are you?

Ever wondered what food you’d be if you weren’t a depressingly average high school student? Well, wonder no more—The Howler is here with a brand-new quiz, perfect for all your freaky Thanksgiving fantasies. My favourite color is… A nice, vibrant red, much like the color

Pumpkin spice epidemic sweeps across campus

In the worst PR disaster in the food industry since Chipotle’s meat recall, Starbucks has announced a total recall of its Pumpkin Spice Latte after the product was found to turn students into pumpkins. According to the American coffee giant itself, Starbucks’ pumpkin spice latte