Broiling flames of rebellion sweep across California as investigations reveal that several cities are now under the control of communist turkeys.
Led by Leon Turksky, more than 250 million factory-farmed gobblers (Agriocharis Ocellata) have joined the Communist Party of Turkeys—not to be confused with the official Communist Party of Turkey—in taking over California. In one of their attacks, the Party had stormed Berkeley City Hall, only to find it already occupied by fellow communists.
“We are more than just Thanksgiving dinners!” Turksky said. “We condemn the mass consumption of both capitalist products and our fellow turkey comrades. My firstborn was deep-fried and turned into an Arby’s sandwich last Thanksgiving; the turkey proletariat will crush the bourgeoisie States of America and rise above our struggles as the Socialist Turkeys’ Republic of America!”
These events have caused growing controversy and paranoia within the Northwood community.
“I couldn’t believe it,” junior Connor Servative said. “The birdbrains have finally learned that they have nothing to lose but their chains. At this point, anyone could be a member of the communist poultry: our friends, our family, our peers, even our teachers. It leaves a fowl taste in my mouth.”